Crush
بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
I know I shouldn't have this kind of feeling at time like this; finals are just around the corner and I need to ace it but I can't help. He just show up out of nowhere during the Lantern festival night and it has been months since the first time I met him.
It was during the registration day and everyone was busy with registration. Pictures for the ID card and some other stuff while me, I was busy observing other students and the new environment. Who wouldn't do that? You're going to stay at a new place and I know no one.
There was him, standing a few feet from me, ready to take his ID photo. He took off his glasses and fixed his hair. I stood there in the line, waiting for my turn along with my racing heart . Why on earth did I stared that day ? I took a deep breath and tell myself, I won't meet him again, there's thousands of other students there. He won't recognize me even if he look at me today. He probably gonna transfer to another place later and yaaddaaa yaddaaa yaddaaa... Yup, I actually said those thing just to make sure I won't fall for him or having unnecessary feelings for him.
I hope I won't fail my goals to not have a crush during matriculation life but I actually fail this time. It has been years since I had a crush. The last time I had this kind of thingy when I was 14 or 15.
Then I move on since the guy already had a girl and now he's studying in Japan with his girl. I pray for their happiness. He was a great senior.
This crush of mine, I hope I won't develop a deeper feeling for him. Let it be just an admiration, a motivator for me to work harder to achieve my goals and dreams. He is a smart guy and obviously, I'm a competitive girl who need to work hard to be at his level.
So, let say, I like him and dear heart, please be strong. I need you to be strong and actually have the will to fight all those thing I shouldn't be feeling for the time being. Focus on your study first and keep all these unnecessary feelings away.
Trying to be strong,
Comments